Computers are useless.
They can only give you answers
- Picasso
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I don't object to Microsoft's monopoly,
I object to Microsoft's mediocrity
- Larry Ellison
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Computers in the future may weigh
no more than 1.5 tons
- Popular Mechanics, forecasting the relentless march of science, 1949
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I worry about my child and the Internet all the time, even though she's too young to have logged on yet. Here's what I worry about. I worry that 10 or 15 or 20 years from now she will come to me and say, 'Daddy, where were you when they took freedom of the press away from the Internet?'
- Mike Godwin
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Net people are also, it seems to me, afflicted with a kind of insularity: It's just too much hassle to express your opinion to someone without an E-Mail address
- Malcolm McMahon
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No matter how fast your computer
system runs, you will eventually come
to think of it as slow
- Unknown
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The Internet is a minefield of opportunity. Step carefully, or another opportunity will go off right in your face
- Russell Davies
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A pretty okay substitute for a life
- Unknown
~
Want to make your computer go really fast? Throw it out the window
- Unknown
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You are surrounded by idiots and assholes - welcome to the Disinformation Stupor Hiway
- Bill Pemberton
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A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history
- with the possible exceptions of
handguns and tequila
- Mitch Ratliffe
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If you can't beat your computer
at chess, try kickboxing
- Unknown
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Intel has announced its next chip:
the Repentium
- Unknown
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The danger from computers is not that they will eventually get as smart as men, but we will meanwhile agree to meet them halfway
- Bernard Avishai
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I think computer viruses should count as life. I think it says something about human nature that the only form of life we have created so far is purely destructive. We've created life in our own image
- Stephen Hawking
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If you're masochistic enough to program in ADA, we're not going to stop you
- Matt Welsh
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Don't get suckered in by the comments ... they can terribly be misleading
- Dave Storer
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Optimization hinders evolution
- Unknown
~
C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot. C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg
- Bjarne Stroustrup
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He who hasn't hacked assembly language as a youth has no heart. He who does as an adult has no brain
- John Moore
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Pascal keeps your hand tied. C gives you enough rope to hang yourself
- Unknown
~
Real programmers can write assembly
code in any language
- Larry Wall
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Real programmers don't work from 9 to 5. If any real programmers are around at 9am it's because they were up all night
- Unknown
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There are two ways to write error-free programs. Only the third one works
- Unknown
~
Real programmers don't comment their code.
If it was hard to write,
it should be hard to understand
- Unknown
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So we went to Atari and said, 'Hey, we've got this amazing thing, even built with some of your parts, and what do you think about funding us? Or we' ll give it to you. We just want to do it. Pay our salary, we'll come work for you.' And they said, 'No.' So then we went to Hewlett-Packard, and they said,
'Hey, we don't need you.
You haven't got through college yet.'
- Apple Computer Inc. founder Steve Jobs
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The only thing I'd rather own than Windows is English. Then I'd be able to charge you an upgrade fee every time I add
new letters like N and T
- Scott McNealy, chairman of Sun Microsystems, Inc.
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The Net interprets censorship as damage, and routes around it
- John Gilmore
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Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning
- Rich Cook
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Unix and C are the ultimate computer viruses
- Unknown
~
ADA, however, seems to be in the early stages of becoming like Latin - a dead or dying language spoken
only by a few high priests
- Jack G. Ganssle
~
Beware of Programmers
who carry screwdrivers
- Leonard Brandwein
~
The world is coming to an end.
Please log off
- Unknown
~
The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That's where we come in; we're computer professionals. We cause accidents
- Nathaniel Borenstein
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Each language has its purpose, however humble. Each language expresses the yin and yang of software. Each language has its place within the Tao. But do not program in Cobol or Fortran if you can help it
- Geoffrey James
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A deadline brings programmers to
the place of no shame
- Close to the Machine:
Technophilia and its Discontents
~